I’m often keener than my clients for their success.
I can probably be a pain in the ass with the amount of information I want to share that will ensure their success if they follow it or challenge me about it so we can find even better solutions for them.
Showing someone how much more capable they are than who they have been taught to believe they are, is something that ignites me.
I’m not a great business man because I give away so many hours of my time that I could have charged for, or information that I could have sold, but I do it because my only objective in those moments is that my clients succeed which also means so do I.
If they fail, I fail.
We can all be so much more, but we all need a dream team around us and someone to believe in us when we start to doubt.
I am no different. I’m hugely flawed and doubt myself and my capabilities more than many.
My confidence in my self regularly wavers and I have to dig very deep to often take leaps of faith that to others are easy choices.
And as I’ve often said, much of what I do is about building our resilience and ability to cope and keep going, rather than some magical cure that changes our personalties and everything become effortless.
A lot of growing is about being able to take the growing pains that come with those changes and being able to stick it out when there just doesn’t seem to be a way out.
But its inside of this feeling of inadequacy that drives me to the point of anger that someone else should believe they are not capable or good enough.
Even though I often struggle to make changes, or know what I should be doing with my life, it somehow gives me an unbridled desire to grab those I encounter by the neck who are imprisoned by self doubt and scream ‘don’t you fucking dare let those fuckers bring you down! You can fucking do this so lets fucking do it!!! Lets get started right now!’
And I know its inside of this that I am also talking to and coaching myself.
Trying to convince yourself or fix yourself is hard work. As Einstein said its very hard to fix a problem with the same thought process that created it.
We need to get outside of my own head and working with others helps me to do that.
As a teacher of mine once said – ‘people keep bring you your problems’. Not because its some new age mysticism, but because we all have the same shit going on.
And if we are congruent and we have integrity, its very hard to tell someone to do something relevant to ourselves, with out unconsciously having to do it as well to keep that feeling of congruency.
The Death crawl clip is, I think, (if you ask many who have worked with me) how I work to ensure I get them over the line.
One criticism I had from a client a few years ago was their only real concern was they where scared to fail because I was so passionate and convinced that they could and would succeed.
I took that on board, but my drive underneath it all is still the same with everyone I work with and that is ‘you can fucking do this!’.
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