“People cannot be knowledgeable about everything but they can be knowledgeable about the extent of their own ignorance”
-Thomas Sowell

I’m a big believer in self reflection and also giving myself and other the space to think out loud and to hear their beliefs, often for the first time and in many cases to question their legitimacy.

Its in this space that we allow ourselves and others to first be listened to and then understood, that we stand a chance of re-evaluating what we think and have been taught, consciously or unconsciously,

If we feel heard and listened to and given space, we are much more likely to be willing to reciprocate, to listen and learn and to understand how others think and feel.

The current climate and the medias often misinformed or deliberate propagandist portrayal of the world often leads to the ‘shutters going down’.

Its easy to preach to the converted and to appear to have solidarity, but this in itself often creates division where Unity is said to be sought.

During the last few weeks I’ve been able to discuss and rant and to observe my own programming. I’ve seen my common sense approach and my real life experiences triumph over theoretic nonsense, but at the same time I’ve come face to face with my own false defences and accusations.

I’ve examined my own prejudices and where some of those have been incubated from and how at times my witness statement and defence stories were not quite as accurate as I thought.

I’ve spent time as I do researching and listening to opposite sides of the fence and then to try and make a more informed decisions.

And I’ve fallen into the trap before of consistent self analysis and searching for all the answers. To attempt to create a rock solid defence and correct belief system that I can stand on the castle defences and protect myself with ‘the truth’.

But its a rabbit hole that a life could be lost to without still knowing all the answers on the subject.

However like all change it starts with us. The problems are rarely ‘out there’ or ‘so and so fault’ but rather with us.

As the saying goes, it my not be our fault but it is our responsibility.

There’s so many opinions out there and so many directions to follow we can easily get lost.

However by simply taking time to look at where, or how we contribute to the problem or to the solution, then change stands a chance.

All the time we are saying ‘you’re wrong I’m right, listen to me, do what I say’ – we are doomed to fail.

It may look like change on the surface but it will simply be treating symptoms not causes and the problem will go internal and fester..

Once we have been shown a better way, given better information and an opportunity to try something new, we wont have to STOP DOING XYZ – we just wont want to.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lO5K1-X6w9E

Early Thursday cold, wet and very windy morning swim last week with the Bluetits/Bluebell Pembs cold water swimmers down in Solva.

A lot of resistance to getting up out of bed and doing it but it turns out, even the hardcore who go everyday and swim all year round battle with the process of getting up and getting in.

And the process is all about getting to the other side. And the truth is no one ever gets out of the water after a cold dip saying ‘that was shit’. It’s always an invigorating experience.

Also the normal anxiety I felt on the journey down to meet them was what I recognised was the feeling of potential failure, or at least a feeling ‘generating itself to stop me failing’ by trying to make me turn back and not take action.

But I recognised that I could also potentially succeed. That the feeling was both potential failure or success and that it offered both – it was the same coin. Why not embrace the feeling as potential success?

At worst it’s 50/50.

So why choose to focus on failing.

Why not an opportunity to succeed?

And it was. Not only did I meet a lovely group of people and get in the water despite the conditions but because they swim further than I would normally choose to, I followed their example and achieved more than I have done before in terms of distance swam in the cold.

It was another opportunity to see what mental skills I used or created to keep me focused and calm when I was uncertain of the situation I was in.

I love that situation, the live testing in the field.

It’s genuine, real and authentic.

And it’s then tools I know really work and I can share.

There’s so much to learn from others and it’s definitely the way to improve.

Be curious of your potential by getting around others who are already where you want to be.

I’m not one of those people who can ‘just wing it’.

I don’t have that ability.

I need to saturate myself in a subject to be able to articulate even the basics to other people and even then, until I hear it out loud do I know whether I’ve really understood it.

They say the best way to learn is to teach and I think that’s right so it’s important to me that what I’m going to teach is right.

That it’s real and practical and that I am congruent in its offering – ie I use it, I’m doing it, I’m testing it in real life and it works rather than this is what I read and simply regurgitating verbatim.

Today my wet suit enjoyed a repetitive breathing session as I drilled a routine over and over until It flows before I go live.

I know we can often over think things and paralyse ourselves out of doing something.

However, often what is stopping us is that our desire to act is oscillating against the reality that ‘we are not ready yet’. ‘

Just do it’ isn’t simply about bowling in half dressed and saying ‘fuck it who cares’ but rather saying ‘I care, what’s stopping me right now and let’s get to work on that.’

Because what often stops us is a genuine knowledge that we don’t know enough that’s masked by the ego that says we should.

If we are not acting out of fear, then we just need to act.

But if we are not acting, because somethings missing, – that sense that we are being in congruent – then we need to explore why that is and start there.

Forget the outcome or the self imposed deadlines.

This is about going slow to go fast.

There’s so much half arsed shit out that takes our money and cons people, that it’s our duty to take the time to do our very best if it’s what we genuinely believe in.

And even that’s about balance!

Beep beep…beep beep……FUCK it can’t be already…..I’ve only just got to fucking sleep!
It’s time to get up and we’ve dragged ourselves over the line to Friday but we know we are only on the conveyor belt bringing us round towards Monday for the replay.
The fresh ideas and hopes we’d put in place that promised that how we feel right now would have become a thing of the past by this point if we just keep going, is met with our internal cynic that doesn’t want to ‘Keep going’.

It says ‘it’s not working, this is bullshit, face reality, it’s all fucked, don’t bother, stop wasting your time.’

The voice is up and raring to go.

The morning alarm has, unlike us, energised it. It’s on us. It’s in our face. And deep down we believe it.

But it’s also a trance state. It’s our internal hypnotist.

It’s the snake out of The jungle Book who’s multicoloured eyes and melodic ‘trust in me’ is zoning us out into apathy and surrender.
5-4-3-2-1! Wake up! We’ve got to get back in the room. Back in the game. Recognise then strategise.
Drown out the voice with someone else’s who is better suited to where we want to be.

Is better suited to advise us as to what is possible. Listen to someone who is going to jolt us back into the fight and up off the canvas.
Who knows what the future holds or whether what we are attempting to do is a fools mission.

Who knows whether anything will really change. But right now, in this moment we really can.

We just need to follow protocol.

Stick the headphones on and listen to someone who’s saying what you need to hear and drown out the voice of negativity!
Mine was to listen to some motivational speakers I like to get my wheels oiled.

I know that motivational speakers are only really useful in firing us up in the moment but in a few days we are back to our same behaviours.

But that’s what I needed – some RA RA! Some cheerleading!
Then on my way to work, to add to my routine I popped into WH Smith and read some inspiring articles in a Climbing magazine about incredible feats of human ability.
It’s about recognising our sticking points and then finding ways to change our states and finding innovative ways to create and develop our own methods.

Starting the creation of a new habit or routines takes work and commitment especially in the early days.

We are attempting to break old conditioning and patterns of behaviour that are ‘natural’ for us to do and then we are attempting to replace them with new, unfamiliar and often uncomfortable processes with no guarantees they will work.
However, if we do stay the course and things do start to get easier and more natural we are still not on ‘easy street’.
It’s often the beginning of the end when things feel as though we can take the foot off the gas.

When we say ‘I’ll leave it today’ or ‘I’ll just do half the routine today’ or even worse ‘I’m feeling really good because of the changes I’ve made so I’ll relax a bit, maybe even start adding some of my old habits back in….should be fine if I don’t get up early and do my routine today…..’
That’s how it felt for me this morning because I was tired and been working long hours. I noticed a few cracks, a little less intent. To much freestyling.

I needed to re read the schedule.
Of course Nothing in isolation makes a difference really.

One lie in, one donut, one cigarette one missed workout etc won’t make a difference other then the fact that it usually creates a chain reaction the sends us back onto our old tracks.
Of course it’s also about being sensible and not blindly following a routine regardless of outcomes. Sometimes we need to stay in bed to recuperate if we’ve been working hard.

Those who don’t heed the signs end up in bed anyway – in bed sick.
So it’s rather the idea of being conscious of this idea.

Of noticing when we are starting to cut corners and examine the reasons.

If it’s simply because we are becoming complacent, we can acknowledge the slip and get back on track. Revive our original why and our original strategy and call today DAY 1 – and say ‘let’s go again!’