There are no perfect solutions to problems. No quick fixes or even lasting change techniques.

 Bold statements and I will be happy to be proved wrong.

Every day I get inundated with New therapeutic systems that I am told make quick and permanent lasting change and come accompanied by streams of testimonials all from people claiming to have been cured of their life long problems, often in one session.

As with advertising on the television, today I will be told that the perfect solution has arrived and works 99% of the time, but in a few months will be told the by the same company, that they have created a superior product to the old one that also works 99% and does what the first product said it did in the original testimonials.

 Does that mean that the original product didn’t really do all that it said? Does it mean that this is the final solution now to fix all our problems? I doubt it. Statistics have a great way of making something that rarely works any more than chance, appear to work 100% of the time!

 What I do know is that it leaves people more and more disillusioned about their own capabilities to make changes and what, if anything, really works.

 Fortunately, or unfortunately we never seem to lose hope. Always looking out for the next solution to our problems. We hang onto the marketing spiel, hoping that this time it will be different. A PayPal click later and we usually find it is not quite the miracle we had hoped for. In fact it’s rarely anything new, but just a rehashed version of the same stuff that didn’t work the first time around.

The more money and time I spend and the more I learn and work with clients regarding self-development work, I realize that there is not, as far as I can tell a simple lasting solution. One that in one sitting, we just walk away and never think about our issue ever again without doing some continual work to maintain the changes.

Those few that do manage to instantly change, are the lucky exception to the rule, rather than the norm that we are led to believe from the hype.

Of course change is subjective and hard to really prove. I have encountered a lot of people who profess that certain therapeutic interventions have worked for them but still seem to continue with the same behaviour patterns they displayed prior to therapy.

The only thing that has changed is their perception of their behaviour or problem rather than the disappearance of the problem or change of behaviour because they have changed their perception.

If changing our perception changes the problem and how we behave in the future then that is great. If changing our perception just changes how we interpret the same actions is it the result we want?

Again this will be contextual but it’s still a question to what is really perceived as having worked therapeutically.

If I used to think I was a Chicken, but after therapy no longer think I am, but when you see me next, find that I’m in the back yard pecking away at grubs and worms, but tell you I know longer think I’m a chicken, has therapy really worked?

I guess it would come down to whether, thinking I was a chicken was the problem as opposed to whether the problem was having a sore nose from all the pecking!

There are no perfect solutions to problems. No quick fixes or even lasting change techniques.

What I believe there is however, are problems that a perfect solution lives inside of for every individual.

Human beings although irrationally predictable come with many variables and to think that one solution fits all is madness. What works perfectly for one person is useless for another with exactly the same problem.

Moving off the solution and really understanding the problem, prioritizing the issues and getting someone to find enough intent and tangible reasons to change is what I believe moves a person to make the changes they want rather than one technique or one therapy or coaching style.

Off the peg solutions from magazines or cardboard cut-out techniques rarely work for us as a long term solution, especially in real life situations where theory continually falls down. 

Theory and reality rarely dance well together when people are involved it seems, and nothing is achieved without individual effort.