Yesterday I had a shitty day.

And because of it, yesterdays mood carried into today.

I find in these states, the slightest things make me want to fly off the handle.

Lashing out isn’t a sustainable resolution, especially when we find ourselves losing our temper over situations that in reality, we have no control over or in isolation are very minor. 

I always want a better way to manage these emotional states, ideally before I’m emotionally sabotaged by a situation.

However this is not always possible. When we lose our temper, the best we can ask for is to afterwards be able to have an opportunity to reflect on what happened.  To look at our response to it and then how to and work towards a better solution when similar incidents occur in the future.

And its not only looking at ways to prevent losing control in that moment, but how we can reduce the incremental build up of negative emotions prior to that event that are often caused by smaller areas of annoyance days, weeks or even months before hand –
( like the bin not being emptied when its spilling out of the top, or the dishwasher not being emptied etc)

Its often these smaller areas, that if not addressed, are the areas that lead to the big explosion which from an outsiders frame of reference, seems to be totally over reactive!

And its not just the build up and the reaching climatic threshold to consider.

Events that play over and over in the mind, making us relive the event days later. (inside of our interpretation of what it means to us, or about us, or how others could be taking advantage of us etc –  regardless of what the reality of the situation is to everyone else. )

Finding ways to break these cycles early on is imperative I think.

Not only at surface level, or even just mentally, but perhaps physiologically at a cellular level, which may lead to something serious happening  to our health and over something that in comparison – especially looked at from the perspective of a terminal illness for example –  is very minor.

Regardless of knowing this, it can be hard to break these cycles when we are inside them and it often takes something from outside of us to snap us out of the vortex of certain mental tortures.

As an example of this, as I walked to work ‘inside of yesterday’s problems and tomorrow’s hopelessness’ a sign on the floor caught my eye. 

It was written by a homeless person on a piece of old card.

Regardless of whether it was a accurate narrative on the sign, or simply a ploy to generate sympathy and in turn the acquisition of money for survival, the fact I acknowledged in that moment was that it wasn’t ‘my sign’.

It wasn’t my sign.

If it was mine, then I’d genuinely have a problem and a right to feel a sense of hopelessness.

It’s not to dismiss our issues, but rather to get a sense of perspective. To see our complaint from another view point or through someone else’s eyes. To enquire as to whether what we are thinking is really true.

Its simply looking at ways to help us break away form these vicious energy sapping cycles, so our focus can get back to appreciating what we do have and what we want to change going forwards.

It’s always a work in progress and not fool proof. I think it always will be a bit snakes and ladders.

In fact the sign certainly wasn’t the final solution for my issues. In the end what I needed was something equally as simple to help me resolve my negative mindset, which ill share next time, but the sign certainly was great way of helping me break out of  my toxic hypnotic trance for that morning that would have leaked into my day and onto those that worked with me.

From my experience there’s no ‘one method’ that fixes everything and certain issues certainly need more time and effort to rectify or come to terms with,

And its because of this that I believe its good to keep looking for clues and signs that we can add to our mental arsenal that can help us escape – even if its only a temporary rest bite from our current state of mind that is keeping us in pain, because it all helps.

And it helps because inside of the rest bites we get chance to connect with what is really causing us discomfort and what actually needs to be done to bring peace back to our ‘tiny skull kingdoms’,